How to build courage to act
Let me tell you about a time I was scared to act. I really wanted to ask for a raise at work, but the thought terrified me. My heart would race just thinking about it. I'd replay conversations in my head and always imagine my boss saying no. I felt stuck, unhappy, and undervalued. That's when I realized I needed to build some courage.
The first thing I did was break down the problem into smaller pieces. Instead of focusing on the big scary "ask for a raise," I started with smaller, less intimidating steps. I began by researching average salaries for my position in my area. This gave me solid data to back up my request and made me feel more confident. Then, I practiced what I wanted to say.
I didn't just rehearse it in my head; I actually spoke the words out loud, in front of a mirror. This helped me get comfortable with the language and identify any stumbling blocks. Next, I visualized success. I imagined myself having a positive conversation with my boss and receiving a fair raise. I tried to really feel the positive emotions associated with this outcome.
It might sound silly, but it really helped shift my mindset. I also started tracking my accomplishments at work. Whenever I completed a significant project or received positive feedback, I made a note of it. This gave me concrete evidence of my value to the company. Another crucial step was accepting that failure was a possibility. I told myself that even if I didn't get the raise, it wouldn't be the end of the world.
I would still have my job, and I would have gained valuable experience in advocating for myself. This reduced the pressure and allowed me to approach the situation with a more relaxed attitude. I even prepared a backup plan, thinking about what I would do if my request was denied. This gave me a sense of control and reduced my anxiety. Finally, the day came when I scheduled the meeting with my boss.
I was still nervous, but I was also prepared. I presented my research, highlighted my accomplishments, and clearly articulated my reasons for wanting a raise. To my surprise, the conversation went well. My boss acknowledged my contributions and agreed to give me a raise, although it wasn't quite as much as I had hoped for. Even though I didn't get everything I wanted, I still considered it a success.
I had faced my fear, taken action, and advocated for myself. The experience taught me that courage isn't about being fearless; it's about taking action despite fear. It's about breaking down big problems into smaller, manageable steps, preparing thoroughly, and accepting that failure is a possibility. And most importantly, it's about believing in yourself and your ability to handle whatever comes your way.
So, if you're facing a situation that requires courage, remember my story and take it one step at a time. You've got this. Start small, prepare well, accept the possibility of failure, and believe in yourself. Building courage is a process, not an event. Now, let's hear from others. Sarah This is a great article. I would also recommend finding a mentor or someone who has experience in the area you are trying to build courage in.
Talking to someone who has been there can provide valuable insights and support. David I think its important to remember your why. Why do you want this raise? Connecting to that deeper reason can fuel your courage when things get tough. Also, practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself throughout the process. Emily I would add that its helpful to celebrate small wins along the way.
Did you successfully research salary data? Great, acknowledge that accomplishment. Every small victory builds momentum and boosts your confidence.
John: Acknowledging and addressing any underlying insecurities or self-doubt is crucial. Sometimes, our lack of courage stems from a deep-seated belief that we're not worthy or capable.
Therapy or self-reflection can be beneficial.
Lisa: I've found that reframing my perspective helps. Instead of seeing a challenge as a threat, I try to view it as an opportunity for growth and learning. This shift in mindset can make it less intimidating to take action.